Good Weekend #2

The trouble with Michael

The Friday night I had allowed Michael to sleep in my bed, in his collar of course, but as I was well aware that it would be the floor Saturday night I was feeling generous. He said to me as I was trying to drift off: “I don’t think I am really cut out for being a slave.” It was not, to be frank, what I wanted to hear.

We talked a little while that night, but he was tired and so was I. It was clear that what he was doing was out of duty, respect, pride even, but there was no enthusiasm there. To give him his due he carried on, in fact given his character there was no expectation of anything else. A further chat later Saturday morning drew out more: basically this boi needed to be doing it out of love.

I had been getting mixed messages. At one stage on Friday he had committed an infraction, and I told him that I was very disappointed in him. For a slave this is a real criticism, and he later admitted that he was crushed. He looked it at the time, apologised profusely and you could feel the relief when I forgave him: these are classic slave reactions. But equally he hated cleaning his boots, for example. He was quite prepared to admit he had been pampered and could not cope with the 2 km walk back from Sainsbury never mind anything else. In other words he simply could not cope with the whole package.

Michael and Paul

Now I had wanted to get Michael and Paul together for a couple of reasons. But an unexpected bonus was a long chat they had on the way to the Hoist on Saturday night. Here were two intelligent lads coming at the issue from very different angles. For Paul, and it is all on his website, adopts a classical US-based approach. For Michael it is informed by his Chinese culture and the approach is different. The results though are, by and large, the same. But Paul too came to the conclusion that what Michael really wanted was a dominant boyfriend, not a Master.

Like me he was also disappointed by Michael’s decision. He too saw great potential in him: not that Michael does not have a considerable array of trained skills already. That both he and Paul got on so well together, bonded so quickly and it was such good fun, in all aspects of the weekend, just makes it even more irritating that it may be the only time I can get them both together.

The trouble with Paul

If that was not enough I may be saying goodbye to Paul too. He has applied to work for the three poor little rich kids up in Sheffield or somewhere as their ‘slave’, I put it in inverted commas as, from what I can find out, it is more Houseboi + kink. Anyway, in all meaningful senses it would probably be goodbye there too. But it is, from some angles I suppose an attractive proposition, no argument there.

The future: cloudy with some possible sunny spells

Now if I was in Manchester I would be laughing. Lots of bois seem to be looking for Masters up there, I have had several approach me and there are more that I could approach. In London: oh God. I don’t know what it is, but there just does not seem to be the interest, the material, or even the curiosity. Now I am quite willing to assume that it is just me, but I have had at least three Masters say the same or similar. No wonder we are ‘importing’ from outside the Greater London area.

But, given the above and the fact that I cannot move anyway geographically my choices are slim: find a good boi or two in London and have occasional visitors, just have the occasional visitors, or give up and go home. Well, as I promised myself on January 1st: one year. On January 1st 2008, well, if I have not found what I want it is back in my box, probably for another four years at least.

M